A few years ago, I participated in a love organization called “Hospice Care”, which is basically a late-stage patient with incurable diseases. The old nurse, Francis, was my mentor. After she retired, she went to the hospice to volunteer. The leader of the organization arranged me to be her assistant.
The first concern that Francis took me to visit was 76-year-old colon cancer patient Roy. On the way, Francis told me that Roy’s cancer cells had spread to the whole body. Half an hour later, I saw Roy. He left a layer of skinny, but the eyes were still bright and radiant. What I didn’t expect was that when I saw me, he tweeted: “Oh, this guy is as bald as I am. It seems that we can get along with relatives.” I touched my bald head, not natural. Smiled.
However, after a few contacts, Roy had an opinion on me. He also told me to Francis that I was a wood man because I was always indifferent to his jokes. This is indeed the case. Although I am only in my thirties, I have tasted all kinds of pains in my life (both parents die, divorce, entrepreneurial failure), and understand the ruthlessness and unpredictability of the world. I don’t believe that I can be happy again. So I rarely smiled at anyone.
One afternoon, Francis asked me to visit Roy alone. At the request of Roy, I took a shower for him. After bathing, I found a painful expression on his face. “I will call the doctor right away.” I said. Then in order to divert his attention, I said: “Your Mickey Mouse pajamas are too childish, I think you should change a grand and important party.”
”Oh, no. I like this pajamas,” Roy said softly. “Mickey Mouse reminds me to laugh often. I think this is more important than what doctors do. Young people, maybe you should buy a high flying pattern. Pajamas.” (Like Mickey Mouse, Gao Fei is also a well-known American protagonist) – Roy laughed, but I didn’t. Roy took my hand and said, “CW, you are the most pessimistic person I have ever seen. You are kind, I know, but if you help others with this attitude, I am afraid it will not work. Everyone thinks you don’t really want to help people.”
Roy’s words made me angry and depressed. I am even afraid to see him again. So, I reduced the number of visits to Roy, and then I simply withdrew from the “hospice care” love organization. A month later, Francis suddenly came to my house and told me that Roy had passed away. “Before he died, he asked me to pass this on to you.” After that, she took out a plastic bag from her bag.
Inside the plastic bag is a T-shirt with a high-flying grin pattern. Roy also left me a note saying, “CW, wear it when you feel your face is too tight. In other words, wear it all the time. Roy.”
I can’t help laughing. At that moment, I understood Roy’s good intentions. He kept telling me that laughter is the most basic means of living in this world, and it is what we need all our lives. Every one of us should smile more and don’t magnify our pain infinitely. Laughter can melt the frost on the family or the workplace. When you are sick in bed, crowded with a crowded bus, and placed in a long queue of shops, you may also want to sneak yourself and let it drive away your troubles.
Over the years, I have witnessed my friends, business partners, and patients who have accepted my “hospice care” to face the difficulties and difficulties in their lives in a humorous way. Their methods are worth learning from each of us. Study and apply these methods, I believe they will be part of your daily life, just as they are now part of my life.
Do not forget the humor in the predicament
Fathers Lawrence Martin Janes and David Jacobs were kidnapped by terrorists and held in a secret location in the Lebanese capital of Beirut. During their detention, the two kept their minds normal through humor, and eagerly searched for positive things.
No one was beaten to the teeth today, they praised each other’s teeth for being strong; tomorrow they had a few meatless chicken bones in their meals, and they smiled and said: “Hey, chicks come to our rice bowl.” Even the kidnappers They promised casually, and they pretended to be happy.
They also teased the kidnappers. “Every night,” Janes said. “The kidnappers who guard us will ask us what we need. We know that they are purely false, because even the simplest requirements we rarely get satisfied, so we often answer loudly: ‘A taxi.'”
After 18 months, the two were rescued. People are all surprised by their still full spirit. Janes told the media: “It is humor that has made us survive this difficult day.”
I believe that many of us are facing problems that are much easier than their 18-month situation, but the truth is often the same: they are troubled when they encounter a small problem. Why not? If you are not working well or have a family conflict, try to think positively. Something succeeded or the problem was solved, and it was also celebrated in a humorous way.
Think more about those happy times
After Roy’s death, I joined the “hospice care” again. Francis arranged me to get along with a young man. From him, I learned a very effective way to cultivate a happy mood. When I visited him for the last time, he handed me a letter. “After I die, please forward this letter to my parents,” he said. “I recalled the good times I spent with my parents.” He told me something interesting. Once, his father took the family to a fancy dress ball, and the whole family dressed as a fruit. Because of speeding, their car was stopped by the traffic police. But when the female police officer saw their dress, the serious expression disappeared. She smiled and asked: “Where are you going? Salad shop?” As a result, the female traffic police did not give them a ticket, but said to them: “Come a little slower. I don’t want you to make the highway full. Jam.” Like these interesting and beautiful memories, he wrote six pages.
There is also a note written to his parents in the letter, saying: Mom and Dad, I hope that you will not only remember what I was when I was sick. You have to think about those wonderful times, they are the memories of my treasure.
Recording happy things with a pen is a simple way to regain confidence in life. As soon as something happens that makes you happy, record it. In this way, if you are in a bad mood someday, reading these happy records, you will feel much better.
Let the mind and body take a vacation in the gods
Psychologist Joan Polissenko wrote in the book “More Happiness, More Health”: “If you think about pessimistic and negative things every day in your mind, you will definitely feel depressed and your body will be Will you get rid of it. Why not use your rich imagination to conceive some positive situations?”
I know a professional diver. Every holiday, he brings his family to this or that diving resort. “I have a small bag that I carry with me. I have the shells I collected over the years when I was on vacation with my family. If I didn’t work well, I stopped and picked a shell from this small bag to play. I will remember the beautiful coral reefs that I found when I was diving with my family or the fish that had a brilliant color. In just a few seconds, I would become more relaxed and concentrate on my work again,” he said. Undoubtedly, he is a firm executor of the above methods.
This spiritual holiday can have many vivid and interesting forms. You can place photos of some famous places in the room or on your desk. When you are at rest, you can go to these places to swim. You can also open the window cloth, stare at the sky, and go to the space of thought. These spiritual tours are cheap and don’t require a lot of money.
See the interesting side of things
Everyone wants to be a smart person rather than an idiot in the eyes of others, a winner rather than a loser. So when we stepped on the banana peel and slipped out of the ugly, we all wanted to disappear immediately.
Why not think about it in an interesting way? Just like my friend Shani did. That night, Shanni’s company held a year-end banquet. Shani got a prize at the party. But when she walked to the center of the stage, she slipped and the prize was on the toes of the award winner. Shani quickly apologized, but when she bent over to smash the prize that had already fallen, the skirt was torn apart. “I don’t think it’s too bad,” Shani said, standing up. “Unless the prize was awarded by the company in recognition of my department’s lack of security throughout the year.” The audience suddenly laughed. Shani also ended up in the laughter of everyone.
The lives of such people are full of sunshine, because they know how to get out of the woods and see the interesting side of things, and they can still be happy in the face of embarrassment.
My grandmother knew this truth 40 years ago. She said: “If you don’t know how to add laughter to your life, I am afraid you will lose a lot.”