Hope you learn to walk alone

 High school winter vacation, I stayed in school because of tutoring, and lived in the dormitory of the school at night. Xiaokai and Xiaoyun, who are not leaving school, have Xiaogou and Xiaoyun in the next room. Xiaokai is because the family is far in the northeast. The winter vacation is too short. I simply stay in school for review. Xiaoyun is because the divorced parents are working outside each other. Stayed in school.
  Usually, the first floor of the district is especially noisy because of the men’s bedroom with dozens of rooms, but in the winter vacation, the big school is empty, but it seems to be lonely and lonely. They both have similar feelings, so we didn’t have much in the past, and we quickly got together. The friendship of the student era came purely. There were not so many preconditions or exchanges of interests. In those days of boredom, we were basically together.
  After one week of tutoring, I was finally able to embark on my way home. Before leaving, I invited Xiaokai to go to my house to play, and he readily accepted it. Regarding whether to invite Xiaoyun to peer, I carefully measured the relationship that was not too close to each other and finally gave up.
  When I left Xiaokai, I watched Xiaoyun’s door closed, and I felt that I was doing something wrong.
  After school, I discovered that I had made a serious mistake. Xiaoyun, who was as enthusiastic as he was during the winter vacation, turned a person downright. Every time he saw me and Xiaokai, he would turn his head to one side. Later, I learned slowly that Xiaoyun, who was considered to be isolated, was once lost for a long time. The state in the circle of friends is full of fierce words like “betrayal” and “deception”, which is shocking.
  Until the college entrance examination, to graduate, to the next few years, my relationship with Xiaoyun has not recovered. For a long time, I couldn’t understand Xiaoyun’s excessive reaction until I experienced a similar dilemma, and I realized that it was such a sadness.
  When I was in college, I lived in a three-bedroom dormitory. There were two roommates in the same bedroom and the opposite bedroom. The three were enthusiastic basketball masters. I met each other in a basketball game, and our feelings went deeper in a field. In the beginning, I will participate in several games, but because of my poor skills, I slowly withdrew from the team, which caused a tacit picture: every sunny weekend, two other roommates happily called Three people in the opposite bedroom, the basketball disappeared at the end of the corridor; I was ignored and lying in bed, sleeping, and the loss of my heart continued to ferment. At the moment when I was not taken seriously, I was the same as Xiaoyun.
  Turning the clock backwards, in the third year after graduating from college, I changed my job, sitting in a strange office with seven or eight new colleagues. After the second week of work on Friday, the old employee Yang Zijie held a wedding thank-you banquet. He greeted everyone and went out to hang out. When he reached out and turned off the lights, he found that I was in front of the computer to make a PPT. He smiled and explained: “Xiaocheng, dinner tonight. The old people who have been employed for more than five years have to talk about a lot of past events, and the new colleagues are not necessarily plugged in. When you just graduated, you need to use money, and you just don’t have to go with me. Please remember to write me alone.”
  Some words are sincere and decent, and straight into my heart. The night falls after the crowd disperses, the warm light of the fluorescent lamp is overturned, the coffee is steaming, the finger is powerfully tapping the keyboard, the cursor on the screen is beating regularly, I continue to focus on the happiness of work, everything is so calm. The fascination of growth is so fascinating, and once again facing the moment of being forgotten and abandoned, my response has been shocked.
  In the past, the sadness of entanglement was replaced by the lightness of the cloud. It is probably that the growth of this road is frankly accepted. How much weight is occupied in the eyes of others, how it is evaluated, how it is looked at, is not so important. There is no shortage of people in the collective who have a good source of both right and left, but those who stand more are ordinary people who are warm, silent, quietly working and unwilling to be buried.
  In this world, each has its own blizzard and chastity. You don’t have to be strict with everyone to fully participate in your life. You can accompany you all the way.
  Hayao Miyazaki’s classic film, Spirited Away, re-released this summer with countless memories. After adulthood, we read the true meaning of life in the film. Windy grass seeds, water waves, thousands of miles into the mysterious fortunate to meet the white dragon, in order to save the risk. However, Bailong’s companionship is limited, and more scenery depends on her own. More dangers depend on her own.
  Think about the wet mood, the youth that were thrown away by the wind in the wind, those lows like the sun falling into the evening, if you can take the time machine back to the past: I want to hold a lost cloud Say sorry to him, and then tell him that even without my friend, it does not hinder his long-lasting life; I also want to hug oneself who is hiding in the upper bunk and even dare to show up, gentle Reassuring him, there will always be a group of people of the same size waiting for you.
  The wonderful thing is that in adulthood today, I am more privileged than I was when I was affirmed and surrounded by others. Sometimes I even tried to push away some parties or invitations for independent space. Fight for. There is nothing wrong with eating alone, traveling alone, or reading alone. The brave is fearless, lonely and free.
  It is not necessary to change our choices because of other people. The reason why most of the world is unhappy is that others are left to their own lives. A person, this is the normal state of life, the time of single-handed fighting, and finally tempered into a sharp edge and armor.
  Lonely and fearless teenager, may you hug and reconcile with hurt, may you learn to walk alone.

Comments Off on Hope you learn to walk alone
error: Content is protected !!