The fat candle

He was once a worthy great son of a great nation. He is just as brilliant, so upbeat, as fiery, as light as his nation.

Flying high with his flames and miracle twists of fate, he rose to the highest, the highest. He was the last to elect him as the controlling head of his nation. It became what was once (a decade ago) called emperor. But this title went out of fashion, like the big-flowered clothes went out, the way out of fashion that bile-green outfit was called «Bismarck en colère» (Bismarck is angry), then the cricket joke, and their mistress with his clothes painted in one color, then the board game «Peter Schwarzer», the chignon, and the sermons of pater Klinkowström, and the potichomanie (pot painting rage) and other changeable tyrannical accents of the age. The imperial title was also one of them. However, the fabrics attached to it remained. The same luxury, lightness, lust, ambition, pleasure fishing,

The new head of state, stepping into his high rank, considered it his first thing to get the great master of the chefs to himself, with twice the salary he would pay to a minister. (But the cat also eats the lunch that a minister cooks.)-290-

They set a day for a bright installation, and they were only preparing for such a big parade as a coronation, it will not be a burden for the most magnificent city in the round world, because everyday life there is as festive as our election.

Many curious people from all over the country flocked to this national holiday. There are no gentlemen or peasants in this country because all people are equal. The only difference is between the floors: parterre, belle étage, first floor, mezzanine, second, third, fourth, fifth floor, attic: these form the ranks among the people. And this classification stands out especially in numbers on the occasion of such a national celebration. In the streets where the head of state will march in the carriage with the ornament, the usage fee for a first-floor window is five hundred francs, and that of the attic room is only one gold.

In the afternoon before the great national holiday, among all sorts of representations, one could see a cohesive party, a man and a woman, huge figures, who were bending their elbows in a path in the flood of the crowd. The man was a stocky, broad-shouldered, short-necked figure with a smoothly shaved face but all the more shaggy eyebrows, while the additional spouse had a huge killer room, bony limbs, and an embroidered headband with a strong charm. They wore a very foreign costume. Boots, stockings, pants, skirts, dolmens, all the way to the hat all have an exotic expression on them.

They brought with them a suitcase covered with calfskin, which was taken over by one or the other, according to the fact that they were tired of wearing it.

They stopped at every gate, read through the register, what is for rent in the house. They shook their heads.

One day, though, they got stuck at one. This will be the most suitable. Sixth floor. Attic room with street window. According to the deal.-291-

They went up here.

The owner of this door was a parliamentary servant, who by his profession already belonged to the parliamentary body and therefore floated at the standard of political life.

The rural couple gave their reflections. They are willing to rent the attic for tomorrow until twelve o’clock at night.

“The price is a gold,” said the room owner.

“They’ll give it,” she said.

– Twenty francs of gold.

– I meant it myself.

With it, he retrieved the gold carefully wrapped in paper from his kamizolta pocket and handed it to the room owner.

“But that’s why the window is made available to us.”

“With the stipulation that I may look down the street during your shoulder as a third beneficiary.”

– That’s right. However, in the evening the whole window is ours. We want to place our own transparent in which we will burn our own candles.

It has also been ratified.

By the time the rural lady, taking her suitcase out of her partner’s hands, attached it and revealed its contents.

It had a large, baked hollow leg, covered in paper, a sliced ​​black bread, then a cauldron-shaped barn, cut out on a black background with white, red, blue oiled paper on the back, and then two strands of dipped candles. Nothing else.

“Aren’t you wearing any underwear on the road?” question terrified the room owner.

The newcomers stared at him, not understanding the thing. What should it be? Change underwear? There is no such thing in their countryside.

– We’ll be back the next day. We’ll be home again in three days.-292-

Three days here, three there, under it just did not become a man’s shirt! Two centuries before that, even Queen Elizabeth of England had only two shirts to change.

The MP from the House of Representatives offered to carry his tenants (for a small fee) all over the big cosmopolitan city and show them its sights, but the good people thanked him nicely, they have nothing to see in this large crowd and its bright shop windows, shop windows, more beautiful sight than a sunset after a warm rain in the mountains, with sheep burning. They just came to see tomorrow’s parade, and today they go to bed at a good time.

Instead, they unloaded the humpback and the black brug, and sat down next to dinner for dinner, and gladly offered their host to keep up with them.

However, the mosque excused itself. He, as a kind of inner man, at the end of the sitting, with the «harlequin» mixed from the buffet remnants of the House of Representatives, was already fed up with urine and did not feel inclined to such a peasant collision.

The two travelers then, having enough dinner from the elementos brought home, lay down and slept until morning.

By morning thunder, they were already on their feet and sitting out the window.

They had a good high view from the attic window of a six-story house.

They could sit there for a long time. The ceremony began in the House of Representatives, from there he passed to the council of elders, from there to the field of military exercises, and only in the afternoon did he finally reach the spacious street where the guests of the janitor were waiting. In the meantime, however, they had had enough cannons, and that, too, is a pleasure for the villager.

From time to time, their host also came home for a moment, to recount the glories of the ceremony that had taken place so far, in which he, as a serving medium, was directly involved. He filled his mouth best with a description of the big banquet (or his preparations) that the capital would give in his town hall in honor of the big man. “One thousand-five hundred-293-place setting! with flowers! Fountains in the middle of the table! Bust of a great man made of ice cream! »

– Do you hear that, old man? said the woman.

“Two thousand gas lamps will illuminate the restaurant, and the name will shine in large letters on the forehead of the band.”

– His name is from gas lamps! Do you hear that, old man?

At last the popular triumph was approaching in this direction.

It was already late in the afternoon.

It will soon be evening last November. He cast the last rays of the day, only on the attic windows, the belletage no longer.

That’s when the big procession came, with rogues and tree trunks along the avenue. Front and back riding troops, in the middle of the cute carriage. From every window the flower fell on the celebrated man. A gallery collapsed under the burden of the crowd, and there was a great commotion. But it was also suppressed by the alarm of enthusiasm.

– Do you see that? Do you hear that? old man, the woman was shivering.

Their elbows dripped down the man’s face.

Then, as the procession with the carriage of triumph passed under their window, they also leaned out of the window and waved greetings to the great hero of the big day with their variegated handkerchiefs.

And the big man, taking off his hat, waved a congratulatory greeting to the cheering audience.

– Do you see this? He saw us! Welcome back to us! enthusiasm of the woman.

“I see the man sobbing, but he didn’t see anything because he wiped his eyes with his handkerchief.”

– Oh, you fool! Kánker de bourgeois! the host laughed. Do you think that great man returned your greetings?

– Isn’t it? she said, because he is our son. I’m his mother, this is his father, look!

– Is this your father? the janitor climbed. Impossible!-294-

However, she took it seriously.

– Do you hear my fellow citizen! Don’t try to doubt that. Because I am an honest woman. I didn’t know a man other than my lord. Therefore, for my son, the great man, surely this little man is his father. Look at it! He looks like he spat it out in his mouth. If you want to see it, here is our passport. We are his sweet parents.

The waist man was dead, staring.

“Are you the big man’s parents?” And you are watching this parade from here from the window of my attic?

– But we do it for ourselves! said the woman, Look what a beautiful transparent we have made in his honor! We also brought a candle. We put this out here in the window.

And with that, he unzipped the two strands of tallow from the paper, lit them, inserted them into the transparent tin holders, and laid them out in the window. It just fit.

The world-famous great man, the head of the mighty, glorious nation, as he entered the ceremonial hall of the town hall, accompanied by his great lords and generals, felt like a little god in the afterlife, in the midst of the raging hail of salvation.

What if you didn’t see the transparent one that glowed red-white-blue letters in the attic room window: Long live our son!

Four months later the great man had fallen, and a year later he became dead. His funeral was also magnificent. He was also allowed to see good peasant people from the attic window.

Then a magnificent statue was erected to him by national gratitude.

At the unveiling of it, there was also the old couple in dust-dress.

– You see that, old man! what a beautiful statue it is! at home in our city there is no such thing as St. Severinus.

The old man wiped his eyes.

“It would have been better for Leo to stay home!”