The Habit of Explaining Everything: Why It’s a Sign of Weakness and How to Break It

  Xiao Liu in the unit has a habit of explaining everything, especially when a certain job or thing is not done well enough, he starts to explain to the leader and colleagues repeatedly. Xiao Liu’s explanations every time are nothing more than these three points: one is that his starting point is good, but he did not achieve the expected effect; This situation is not caused by him alone. He will list a lot of objective reasons, but rarely find reasons for it subjectively.
  Leaders and colleagues are very disgusted with this habit of Xiao Liu Ai’s explanations, and they often remind him overtly and secretly, but Xiao Liu is still the same, explaining everything he encounters, as if others cannot understand him without explaining.
  This reminds me of Ivan in the Russian writer Chekhov’s novel “Death of a Little Civil Servant”. Ivan was a small clerk. Once when he was watching an opera in the theater, he accidentally sneezed. This sneeze happened to hit the bald head of a general in the front seat. This frightened Ivan, he quickly moved his head to explain that he didn’t do it on purpose, please forgive me, General. In fact, the general didn’t care, and even said it was nothing. But Ivan was still explaining incessantly, which made the general unable to watch the drama normally. During the intermission, Ivan ran to the general to explain again, and even went to the general’s office to explain several times later. The general was finally enraged, and stomped his feet and shouted at him: “Get out!” Ivan felt something shatter in his stomach, and finally died in depression and fear.
  People who are keen on explaining generally have the following three characteristics: First, such people generally have no self-confidence. Because I feel unsure about what I have done and have no idea, so when faced with bad results, I keep explaining, hoping to get the understanding and support of others.
  Secondly, such people are generally not responsible. When there is a problem in life or work, it is not to find the cause from oneself, actively make up for one’s own shortcomings, avoid making mistakes again, and strive for good results, but to do everything possible to find objective reasons, explain endlessly, and shirk one’s own responsibility.
  Furthermore, such people are generally not broad-minded enough, and the pattern is too small. Always treat something that is not a big deal at all, and imagine the consequences are extremely serious, just like the inferior and timid Ivan in “The Death of a Little Civil Servant”, who sneezed Things, the result explained and explained, and finally scared myself to death. Such a person annoys others and makes them unhappy.
  In fact, no matter in life or work, there is no need to explain so much. What is clear will be clear, and what is turbid will be turbid. A person who understands you, you don’t need to explain, he also understands what’s going on with you. In the face of someone who doesn’t understand you, no matter how much you explain, he won’t listen, and the result can only be more and more black and white, which is counterproductive.
  The real strong don’t bother to explain, the clear one clears itself, and time will prove everything.
  The Italian poet Dante once said: Go your own way and let others speak. In fact, there is no need for so many explanations in life, just try to do your own thing well and be ashamed of your heart.

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