The Universal Lessons of Love and Marriage From Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice

In the history of British literature, there is a female writer who is considered to be the female version of Shakespeare.

That is Jane Austen.

Her debut novel “Pride and Prejudice”, written at the age of 21, has been prosperous for 200 years since its publication. Not only has readers spread all over the world, but it has also been put on the big screen many times.

This best-selling novel known as the “White Paper on Marriage” tells the emotional stories of four people:

The eldest sister, Jane, and the second sister, Elizabeth, captured their sincerity with virtue and married love as they wished;

The younger sister Lydia was vain and frivolous, and was eventually deceived by a scumbag, which led to a lifetime of tragedy.

And Elizabeth’s good friend Charlotte married someone she didn’t love for money.

After revisiting this book, I realized that there is also a “law of attraction” in marriage:

Whoever you are, you will meet;

What kind of person you are, what kind of person you will marry.

It is never feelings or money that decides marriage, but yourself.

An indulgent soul invites only vile villains

The story takes place in the English countryside, in the home of a squire named Bennet.

Mr. Bennet had five daughters, the youngest being Lydia, who was fifteen years old.

Lydia is unstable and fun-loving, and often went out with her family to socialize before she was an adult.

While her sisters were reading and practicing the piano at home, she secretly went shopping in the next town to inquire about gossip for entertainment.

For a while there was a militia regiment stationed in the town, which consisted of handsome officers.

Lydia was so excited that she tried her best to attend various balls, laughing, chatting and flirting with the officers present.

When the militia changed places to station, an officer’s wife had the same interests as Lydia and invited her to go with him to play.

She readily agreed, intending to leave home alone and continue to live a happy life of feasting and feasting.

The book says:
“She fantasizes about dozens of unknown officers competing to court her, while she sits in a tent, flirting affectionately with at least six officers.”

In this way, Lydia went out happily regardless of her family’s dissuasion.

Unexpectedly, after she left home for a few months, the family did not expect her return date, but waited for a bad news:

Lydia elopes with an officer!

The officer’s name was Wickham, he was tall and handsome, and he always had a gentle and reliable appearance.

But in fact, the officer just looked like a human being.

He has a very bad reputation in his hometown. Not only is he not enterprising, but he also loves gambling, and he is in debt.

There was a lot of noise about the elopement of the two, and Bennet had to persuade Wickham to marry a wife to preserve Lydia’s reputation.

The cunning Wickham actually used this as a bargaining chip, asking Bennet to pay off his debts and provide him with a considerable living allowance.

For Lydia, Bennet had to agree.

After marriage, Wickham’s nature was revealed, and he relapsed into old ways. He often stayed out at night, looking for pleasure everywhere, regardless of Lydia’s life or death.

Lydia also lingers in various balls. She has no source of income, so she can only ask her sisters for help, and her life is miserable.

Writer Zhuang Yating said:
“Don’t say that you are not good at meeting people. The kind of person you become is determined by the kind of person you meet.

From this point of view, if men and women in the world can come together, they are a perfect match. ”

But I never thought about it: the bad people you meet are all attracted by you.

You know, flowers can attract butterflies, and rotten meat can only attract flies.

If you want to find a lover and reap true love, you must cherish yourself, respect yourself, and love yourself.

Learn to love yourself well, and then someone will love you well.

A realistic man can only meet a material woman

Before Lydia got married, she received her cousin Collins with her family.

Collins is a twenty-five-year-old youth. He didn’t get a decent family education since he was a child, and he managed to get into college, and he didn’t learn any real skills.

By chance, he got a gift from the local aristocrat Mrs. Catherine, and became a priest. He immediately felt proud and felt superior.

He thought to himself that as long as he married another beautiful wife, he would be able to reach the peak of his life.

At the beginning, he picked the most beautiful Jane in Bennet’s house, and after learning that she already wanted her, he turned his target to Elizabeth.

He thinks that he has a decent job and considerable property. Apart from himself, Elizabeth can’t find a better marriage partner.

So Collins confidently stopped Elizabeth and allowed her to be his wife.

Unexpectedly, she was severely rejected by Elizabeth.

Collins became furious and turned to Elizabeth’s good friend Charlotte to woo, and the result was a great success.

It turned out that when Charlotte learned of Collins’ family background, Charlotte secretly had a plan in her heart.

She knew that Elizabeth was tired of Collins, so she took the initiative to undertake most of the hospitality work, and deliberately got close to Collins to express her favor.

As an ordinary-looking old leftover woman from a poor background, Charlotte thinks this way:
“For women without money, love is far less important than marriage.

Although being married does not necessarily make people happy, it is always the most suitable safe for women, ensuring that they do not go hungry. ”

This marriage of getting what they need was quickly finalized, and it didn’t take long for the two to become husband and wife.

After Collins completed the task of getting married, he was still busy trying to curry favor with his boss, forgetting about his wife.

Charlotte, on the other hand, can only guard the empty room all day, live the days of sharing the same bed with her husband, and spend her whole life in a loveless marriage.

In love, you put in a little love, and you can get a little love.

If you treat marriage as a bargaining chip, don’t blame others for treating love as a bargain.

If you regard love as a task, don’t think others use marriage as a springboard.

I only think about reality, and all I meet are people who stare at material things.

As everyone knows, a marriage based on material things is doomed to not last long without feelings as a foundation.

As Jane Austen said:
“A marriage that only thinks about money is absurd, and a marriage that doesn’t think about money is stupid.”

There is porridge to warm the stomach, and someone to warm the heart, which is the most beautiful appearance of marriage.

A good lady always attracts a righteous gentleman

In the Bennet family, the tragic marriage of the younger sister Lydia is different. The older sister Jane is the most handsome and the best character. The family has great expectations for her marriage.

Sisters who disagree, she is the peacemaker, friends who disagree, she is the mediator.

If someone treats her kindly, she will definitely repay her very much. When someone hurts her once, she never wants to judge others with malice, and always believes that they have their own unspeakable difficulties.

Her beauty and gentleness have fascinated countless unmarried men, but she has never been easily tempted by others.

One day, the neighbor’s mansion, which has been vacant for a long time, has a new tenant, the wealthy young master Bentley from out of town.

Bentley is a well-to-do man, tall and handsome, with a gentle and amiable temper.

He treats his friends with confidence, never cares about money, and doesn’t care about gains and losses.

He is generous and kind to his neighbors, and he is unanimously affirmed by everyone.

At the welcome ball, Bingley fell in love with Jane at first sight, and his heart has been hung on her ever since.

When Jane caught a cold and had a fever, Bingley tried every means to find the best doctor to take good care of her.

When Jane has nothing to do, Bingley chats with her about music and books, and it won’t get boring after a day.

As for Jane, on the surface she is self-restraining and polite, and she is calm about it, and occasionally confides her love for Bentley to her sister Elizabeth in private.

Just when everyone thought their marriage was settled, Bingley suddenly left for London without saying goodbye.

Jane was so sad that she waited hard at home first, and then she accepted the invitation of her aunt to go to London, hoping to meet Bingley by chance.

However, she was still unable to meet Bentley, so she had to bury this relationship deeply in her heart.

At this time, Bentley knew nothing about all this.

He listened to the persuasion of his friend Darcy, and decided that Jane had no feelings for him, so he might as well choose to give up and stop the loss in time.

However, he never forgot Jane for a moment, and drank his sorrows every day, living a decadent life.

Until Darcy told him that Jane had always been in love with himself, it was Darcy who misunderstood Jane’s intentions.

The misunderstanding was resolved, and Bingley arranged the schedule non-stop and returned to Bennet’s house.

When they met again, one of them no longer flinched, the other no longer was weak, and finally opened their hearts to each other.

Bingley confessed affectionately, and married his beloved girl as he wished.

Teacher Luo Xiang once put forward a point of view:
“True love is to recognize each other from the soul, not to indulge in physical attraction.”

In fact, all romantic encounters in this world are destined.

The kindness that grows in the bottom of my heart is destined to attract the upbringing engraved in the bone marrow.

Only a lady with a gentle heart can capture a gentleman with integrity.

People with compatible souls will meet each other even if they are thousands of miles apart, and will eventually reunite even if they are separated for a short time.

Only by making yourself beautiful can you wait for someone who is equally beautiful.

Noble character, always chasing noble soul

Elizabeth, who has the best relationship with Jane, is the second child in the Bennet family. She has a straightforward personality and independent thinking.

When Collins proposed to her, she stuck to her principles and soberly resisted the temptation of money;

When Lydia indulges herself, she foresees a crisis and reminds her father to restrain Lydia.

Because of this, when she first met Bingley’s friend Darcy at the welcome ball, she was not attracted by Darcy’s handsome appearance and prominent family background.

In her opinion, Darcy had a haughty manner, never condescending to ask a lady to dance, much less socializing with others.

In addition, Lydia’s favorite officer, Wickham, claims to be Darcy’s old acquaintance.

He publicized Darcy’s despicable behavior everywhere, all of which made Elizabeth hate Darcy.

On the other hand, Darcy, at the ball, he saw Elizabeth’s mother was bent on clinging to the powerful, and his sisters were busy chasing men, and even he had a bad impression of the angular Elizabeth.

Later, with the deepening of contacts, Elizabeth’s unique views on things and her neither humble nor overbearing towards the powerful attracted Darcy deeply.

One day, he couldn’t help confessing his love to Elizabeth, but was severely rejected.

Elizabeth speaks out of her dislike of him and lists his “crimes”.

Until then, Darcy learned that there were many misunderstandings between the two.

After thinking about it, he made up his mind to take action.

He first specially wrote a long letter to clarify Wickham’s slanders against him one by one.

Then I re-examined my character, began to observe the words and deeds of others, consciously let go of my arrogance, and treated others gently.

Half a year later, Elizabeth went out with her uncle’s family and met Darcy in the manor.

The two finally meet again.

At this time, Darcy has become gentle and polite. He not only greets Elizabeth, but also no longer treats her family arrogantly.

Later, Darcy even assumed Wickham’s huge debt for Elizabeth, which promoted his marriage with Lydia.

Elizabeth, who sees all this in her eyes, gradually discovers Darcy’s noble character, and gradually falls in love with him.

When Elizabeth let go of her prejudice and Darcy changed her arrogance, the two lovers finally came together.

someone said:
“Excellent souls are destined to be attracted by excellent souls.”

A person with an ugly heart will not be favored by a gentleman no matter how beautiful his skin is.

A person with a noble heart can be favored by a gentleman no matter how ordinary he looks.

Love is something that always begins with appearance and ends with character.

If you want to marry a noble soul, the best way is to make yourself noble.

Learn to empathize, let go of ignorance and prejudice, and stick to your inner principles.

When you become rich inside, you will eventually meet someone who is right with you in spirit.

In nature, there is a “law of attraction”.

It means that there is an attraction between objects and objects.

In fact, the same applies to people.

All our thinking activities will generate a certain magnetic field, which will attract thoughts of the same frequency and bring people of the same frequency.

Just like the marriage in “Pride and Prejudice”, the noble character is always close, and the fallen soul is always falling together.

The seemingly casual encounter is actually the mutual attraction of two similar souls;

The seemingly logical combination is actually a two-way rush of two identical personalities.

When love is not going well, instead of standing still and complaining about fate, it is better to spend time on self-cultivation.

Polish yourself into a pearl, and one day, you will meet another shining person.

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