Swallow palm

　　Swallow palm is the first green plant in my house since I came to Japan.
　　At the beginning, I chose to raise it mainly because it was easy to serve. It only needs to drink water without fertilizing, and it can grow plump and emerald green leaves.
　　It is neither hypocritical, nor does it invite credit, it grows cheerfully all year round, and is happily for people to appreciate.
　　In the first few years when I first came to Japan, because I was afraid of being poor, there were almost no holidays on my calendar. I had to go to work every day, and I had to run non-stop in the 23rd district of Tokyo every day… Those days were
　　like A heavy stone once weighed on my flustered heart, making me unable to see the colorful colors of life, and often even have a sense of vicissitudes that life is like a dream.
　　In the gloomy days, people always choose one thing to love deeply to resolve their sorrows, right? I think, it was probably in this state of mind that I took back this little green Swallow’s Palm, carefully stocked it on the balcony, and placed it under the sunlight that my eyes can easily touch.
　　After raising it, it has been with me for nearly twenty-five years, and we have really become old friends now. On a sunny day, I will hold a cup of coffee and admire its smiling face while sipping it.
　　When there is wind, rain, thunder and lightning, it will stand upright and face it without fear. Although it was a very poor time when we first arrived in Japan, because of the company of swallow’s palm, it made our life exude a warm atmosphere all the time.
　　In the first few years in Tokyo, I don’t know how many times we moved. Every time I move, I have to throw things away and buy furniture again. Naturally, the swallow’s palm couldn’t escape the thrown things.
　　It’s just that I’m lenient with it: I often carefully cut off one of its strong and beautiful limbs, and bring it to a new home for further planting, and the rest of the trunk has to be thrown away.
　　Of course it is very pity and reluctance, but there is really no way, this is the cruel reality, because the limited space of housing in Japan has already made us develop the habit of leaving.
　　After we moved into our new home for the last time, my wish was finally fulfilled. Not only did we find the best location in Tokyo, we had three spacious and bright houses, and a large south-facing balcony.
　　So, I finally made up my mind to move in dignifiedly with my huge and upright Swallow’s Palm, and together we became the masters of the new home dignifiedly.
　　I was worried that it would be lonely, and at the same time, I invited many other plants in, such as vines, golden heart Brazilian iron, prickly pears… They stood in a row on the spacious balcony, and shared the rain and dew as the masters of this new home.
　　In my new home, the entire balcony has instantly turned into a piece of emerald green. Looking at all this, I feel very good. I feel that every day I live now is the youngest and happiest day in the rest of my life.
　　The Swallow Palm, which has no worries about food and clothing, has grown vigorously in our house since then. Its dark green and tall and straight figure will always become my favorite and the one that attracts my attention the most. I often use it as an example , He has shown off his achievements many times in front of Mr. In fact, it was because of Yanzizhang’s tenacious vitality.
　　In April of the next year, I accidentally discovered that this tenacious Swallow’s palm had been moved and amputated several times and was safe and sound. Why did it lose its former vitality for no reason, and showed a dejected look? At that time, I thought it was due to lack of water… However, after a few days of patiently serving it, not only did its face not return to its original emerald green, but it became closer to earthy gray.
　　While I was wondering, I couldn’t help but bent down pityingly, stretched out my slender fingers, and bent slightly loosely to caress its thin limbs… The swallow’s palm, which was always stiff, was
　　drooping now, as if it was in a serious illness. Like other people, he looked like he was staggering around without any strength. This undoubtedly means that it is already terminally ill.
　　As soon as I touched it with my hand, it shook feebly, as if there was no root under its feet, and it was in danger of falling down at any time.
　　I realized the seriousness of the problem, so I deliberately touched it a few more times, and now it swayed more like drunk, and I seemed to smell its breath, which smelled of despair and sadness . The swallow’s palm, which has always been tough and upright, is now full of endless sorrow, and it is telling me silently…
　　Hey, what’s going on here? I have been raising it for so many years, and this is the first time I have encountered it. At that moment, I really panicked and blamed myself.
　　It was too late and then it was too late, I hurriedly uprooted it and poured out the soil in the flowerpot, intending to diagnose it, but what I didn’t expect was that I was stunned at that moment. After staying there, my scalp exploded and I got goosebumps all over my body.
　　It turns out that there are a bunch of huge pests lurking in its roots, and they are greedily sucking the blood of the swallow’s palm… My tenderness and guilt for the swallow’s palm instantly burst into anger.
　　My God, I couldn’t help exclaiming: Poor Yanzizhang, why are you so unlucky? Where the hell do these damn wriggling vermin come from? Could it be that it fell from the sky?
　　Seeing that they are still greedily and shamelessly gnawing on my swallow’s palm, they have already gnawed away all its roots!
　　My heart throbbed with pain. While hating these hateful “white maggots”, I also hate my own carelessness. It was the pain of guilt.
　　After the original dark soil was poured out, under the bright and warm sunshine, there were more than a dozen fat white maggot-like larvae in the soil. Because they were not used to the sudden sunshine, they bowed in panic in broad daylight. She squirmed on her body, twisting her fat buttocks and running around. At this moment, one is white and the other is black, they are particularly eye-catching and hateful in the fertile soil.
　　I hastily called my husband, and we both squatted down and studied the fat worms and fertile soil carefully before we decided: These fat larvae must be the larvae of cicadas.
　　However, I don’t know when and what month they laid their eggs in the flowerpot of my house. This hateful cicada has struggled like this until his death, and is so cunning! Quietly let its children lurk at the root of the swallow’s palm.
　　The first flash of thought was: I want to kill these cicadas and avenge my swallow’s palm. When I was trying to vent the malice in my heart, I picked up a gardening shovel and said in a very proud tone: “Now let me take revenge and kill them for Swallow’s Palm!”
　　Angrily, I hurriedly took out the new soil from the bag, scraped off the remnants of the porcelain flower pot, filled it with new soil, and then carefully planted the dying swallow’s palm in it again, straightened it carefully and watered it .
　　Do it while praying that it can escape this disaster. In my association with it for so many years, I have already known the temperament of Yan Zizhang, I know it is very tenacious, I believe it will overcome this test. The most terrifying thing in the world is not only the sudden disaster, but also the despair of losing immunity. And I always believe that the swallow’s palm with strong vitality in my family is born with the ability to save itself.
　　The husband also echoed me and said: “In this way, separate them and believe that it will be fine.”

　　While cultivating the soil, I felt my husband’s sympathy for the pests with the peripheral vision of my eyes. His kindness, what I feel at this time is just hypocritical kindness.
　　”Let’s be honest, what do you want to justify them in your heart?”
　　I laughed at him in my heart, this science and engineering man, since the day I met him when I was young, his weakness has always been the memory he left in our marriage. When my mother was alive, she often praised him for his kindness, but I often felt that he was just timid and weak.
　　In the days when there are wind, rain, thunder and lightning, his philosophy has always been to go around and think about the people and things that have caused him trouble. Can’t remember who he had quarrels and annoyances with. Although he was once a Japanese orphan who was abandoned in China, the love given to him by his adoptive parents made him a poor and unfortunate childhood. Not only did he have a reunion and happy family, but that family planted “love” in his heart forever After the seed grows, it exudes a warm atmosphere all its life.
　　At the moment when I was full of hatred and wanted to kill those big fat worms with their heads hidden and their tails exposed, my husband finally couldn’t help it, and said to me in a pleading voice: “Look, there are not many worms in our family. The extra flower pots… I think it’s better to forget it, anyway, they are a life, it’s better not to kill them, it’s better to separate them…” I stared at him with fiery eyes
　　, I asked puzzledly: “What are you talking about? Do you want to raise these pests?”
　　He avoided my looking eyes and didn’t answer me, but muttered to himself: “You know how cicadas live? How do you spend your life?… In summer, have you heard the familiar voice under the tree? “I know – I know – I know”, it means that these eggs grow up and become cicadas… The life of cicadas can only enter summer after going through three stages: fertilized eggs, larvae, and adults. The fertilized eggs laid in the early years will hatch into larvae. They will drill into the soil and feed on the juice of plant roots. Usually, the larvae will be in the soil. Wait for a few years or even ten years…Why, don’t you believe it? I’m not lying to you, if you don’t believe it, you can check it on the computer, am I right?…They often reach the end of June, when the larvae die When they are mature, they will crawl from the soil to the ground…”
　　I was about to get angry, but I was a little confused when I heard his words. I muttered the meaning of his words in my heart, looked at him well, and retorted: “Why are you telling me so much? Do they have anything to do with me? He
　　said flatteringly: “How could it have anything to do with you? I just think that their lives are not easy… Think about it, everyone in this world has their own difficulties, right? They can’t control themselves either. Is my fate right?…”
　　After he finished speaking, he hurriedly avoided my gaze, looking for an idle flower pot with a sad face.
　　Immediately a ghost came to my mind: Didn’t he hint at his own destiny to me by saying these words? …His words made me see signs of his insinuation. At that moment, I also inexplicably thought of it: since he knew that he was a war orphan, he never killed, even if it was an inconspicuous spider or an annoying fly. We should open the windows and release them instead of beating them to death.
　　How many times have I questioned him puzzledly, but he just answered me without raising his head: “They are also a life!”
　　Mr.’s words once resolved the doubts in my heart.
　　”But today is different. This disgusting bug has killed this flower…” As soon as I thought of his life experience, my tone softened. Over the years, the understanding and love in the common life.
　　”That’s true. Actually, if you think about it carefully, whether it’s darkness or light, they have never complained about their lives, let alone give up their lives easily, but desperately looking for food…they It’s also for survival… If you want to blame, we should blame us for being careless, right?…” He finished talking to me, then changed the subject suddenly, and talked about those pests again.
　　As soon as I turned my head, I really wanted to throw him and his weird talks aside.
　　Unexpectedly, what he said later, all the peace of mind that I once thought I was self-righteous, collapsed in an instant.
　　From the glass window on the side of the balcony, I saw that his eyes were also red. I don’t know if he thought of something again… To the Chinese who saved his life, he was once a child of the enemy. Think about it carefully. , It’s no different from these cicadas…
　　But I just thought, but didn’t say it, I just wanted to turn my back to him, avoid Mr.’s gaze, silently shovel the soil, and put those fat white bugs back into the soil , which is their new home.
　　I felt that my husband smiled gratifiedly. Although this thin old man who has been with me day and night for nearly fifty years is older and haggard than before, his eyes have not changed, they are still bright, and his mind is still flexible.
　　The gentleman polished the black porcelain flower pot attentively, and carefully filled it with wet soil bit by bit.
　　”Actually, these disgusting bugs also have their wonderful features!”
　　I looked at him with puzzled eyes, and thought: Don’t be fooled by him so easily! See what new tricks he has?
　　”…In the sweltering summer, what is the most hard-working music? It’s the cicadas. Right? If you think about it carefully, is what I said true?…Even though the cicada is so small, it has It’s an admirable place!…The whole life of any life is extremely difficult…you give them warmth, I believe they will feel it…” At
　　that moment, I admired Mr. Tongue, also understood his hints over and over again.
　　I couldn’t help thinking of Mr. Cicada’s life from Cicada’s life. Thinking of his experience, I was speechless. His words made me think for a long time and feel distressed for a long time. Frankly speaking, my inner feelings are very complicated, and at the same time I am ashamed of my own complexity.
　　The life of a cicada is both long and short, and the life of a cicada underground is long… and it is only a summer… In fact, if you think about it, life is like a cicada.
　　From birth to death, people live in the world of mortals for only more than 30,000 days. During this period, not only have to experience the four seasons, experience growth, experience struggle and suffering, and some also experience war. The coercion of war often turns innocent people into homeless orphans, and some even become bad people, poor people who have lost everything.
　　This is true in the natural world, and it is also true in the human world. There are more or less situations that make life full of variables and situations that we cannot even control ourselves.
　　The enlightenment of cicada’s life to us humans is: whether it is darkness or light, these are not what it can control and reverse. It can only look for nutrients that can sustain it in the dark, and it is futile to complain about its own suffering.
　　Don’t complain about fate at any time, and don’t surrender to fate easily. This is what we should do. Even the bugs that make me feel disgusting in front of me, although they are pests, they do have a wonderful side. The life of a cicada is like this, and the life of a human being is even more like this.
　　Thinking of this, my anger gradually dissipated, and finally I took a step back in relief, and gave those ugly fat bugs a flowerpot that could survive as a nest, hoping that they could get out of the soil sooner .
　　A week later, the leaves of the new house’s swallow’s palm gradually had a bright green luster; two weeks later, the swallow’s palm seemed to have established a firm foothold; It quietly gave birth to new green leaves, which shows that it has fully recovered.
　　My heart finally gradually became calm from anger, and became cheerful and relieved. At the same time, I am also quietly looking forward to the new life in another pot that can climb out as soon as possible. I really want to watch them spread their wings and fly, and sing in the hot summer: telling people that their life is short but wonderful the process of.